Is it bad....

Message

marrymeflyfree · #1 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 6:40 am

...when the person (people?) one is throwing a party for is a no-show?

The dreaded shower is today. In Tennessee. And I am in Pennsylvania. I could have flown down yesterday or the day before, and had planned to...but it's hard to fight the instinct to stay here and feather my nest.

No worries, I thought. I'll just hop on today's 7:30am flight to KnoxVegas instead. Upon second glance last night, I realized that the 7:30am flight was really a 7:30pm flight. Not a great choice for the 2pm party.

My only other option was leaving Newark at 5:30am (which means leaving my house at 3am) for Houston, then hopefully getting on a nearly full flight to Knoxville which would arrive exactly 20 minutes before the shower.

Leaving my house at 3am means getting up at 2am, which was not an option at 2am when my alarm went off. The Naughty Norwegian, protective dad-to-be that he is, thought it unwise for his 8-months pregnant baby mama to have such a stupidly long day in the air. When the alarm sounded, he turned it off and snuggled up so perfectly that any (small) desire I had to get out of bed was thwarted. I think I'll keep him around, just for doing that.

I really did want to go and see everyone, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it the last few days. I feel good. There was no tangible reason not to...but I think it was the nesting thing. Instinct is powerful. When my dogs had puppies, they never strayed far from their chosen spot in the days leading up to the birth. I think I understand why.

Baby shower by webcam should be interesting.

peacock2121 · #2 Post by **peacock2121** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 6:45 am

While I was asking my question, you answered it.

I think you didn't go because you didn't want to and you never wanted to. I think you never got on board with the idea and you didn't want to say so. I think you have every right to not want a shower. I think you never told the truth to yourself or to them.

I love the web-cam idea. I especially love it if there will be a whole bunch of old people who have no idea how the sucker works.

I didn't mean to be harsh or accusatory. I just think I am right.

marrymeflyfree · #3 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 7:11 am

You might be a little right, though I had really warmed up to the idea over the last few weeks. And I really did want to see everyone....including the two new babies that I haven't met yet. (Another cousin is pregnant now, too...if we can just get my SIL knocked up, we'll have a matched set on that side of the family within a year.)

If the party had been even just a couple of weeks earlier, I think I'd have definitely been there. I just seem to have turned a corner in the last week. Huge growth spurt. I've felt so good that I'd have to remind myself that I was pregnant - but I'm really feeling it now. I had a hard time with the decision to delay going in the last few days because I'm a pretty tough chickie, and I just keep going and going and doing and doing...but at some point I have to be smart and slow down - and I think I've hit that point. But admitting that is hard for me to do.

jaybee · #4 Post by **jaybee** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 8:05 am

Just as well - It's raining in Knoxville right now anyway.

MMFF - You want me to put on a dress, stuff a pillow up underneath it and go as your proxy? I'm typing this about 10 minutes from downtown Knoxville so I'm sure I could make it there by 2. Besides, I just shaved the beard off yesterday evening so maybe nobody would notice.

Did I just type that out loud?

marrymeflyfree · #5 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 8:16 am

jaybee wrote:Just as well - It's raining in Knoxville right now anyway.

MMFF - You want me to put on a dress, stuff a pillow up underneath it and go as your proxy? I'm typing this about 10 minutes from downtown Knoxville so I'm sure I could make it there by 2. Besides, I just shaved the beard off yesterday evening so maybe nobody would notice.

Did I just type that out loud?

You know, I haven't seen some of these people in so long that your plan just might work! Toss on a long blonde wig and you just might pass! The party is in Louisville on the lake, and there will be food and gifts for you when you arrive.

Does it feel odd to be newly beardless? I think it would be like shaving your head for the first time...a strangely smooth feel.

PlacentiaSoccerMom · #6 Post by **PlacentiaSoccerMom** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 8:23 am

Is it safe for you to travel by airplane when you are 8 months pregnant? I always thought that it wasn't safe to travel after the seventh month.

PlacentiaSoccerMom · #7 Post by **PlacentiaSoccerMom** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 8:25 am

peacock2121 wrote:While I was asking my question, you answered it.

I think you didn't go because you didn't want to and you never wanted to. I think you never got on board with the idea and you didn't want to say so. I think you have every right to not want a shower. I think you never told the truth to yourself or to them.

I love the web-cam idea. I especially love it if there will be a whole bunch of old people who have no idea how the sucker works.

I didn't mean to be harsh or accusatory. I just think I am right.

I think that you are right too.

People will gather on your behalf and have fun. You will get to stay close to home. I think that everyone win.

Anyone who has been pregnant will understand why you didn't want to travel to the shower.

marrymeflyfree · #8 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 8:42 am

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:Is it safe for you to travel by airplane when you are 8 months pregnant? I always thought that it wasn't safe to travel after the seventh month.

It's not generally a problem as long as everything is as it should be. My airline suggests discussing travel with your HCP after seven months, but doesn't require a note unless you are within 7 days of your due date - and even then, they'll never deny boarding unless you're obviously in labor.

There is a theory that changing cabin pressure could encourage one's water to break, but the changes are so minor that it probably has very little relevance. Most seem to think that if it happens on a plane, it was going to happen very soon anyway. Slightly increased risk of blood clots on longer flights, but you can reduce that if you keep moving and take a walk now and then.

A friend of mine, a FA who lives here in the states but whose family is all in the UK, flew back here from London at 39 weeks! The worst of it was that there were no empty seats, so she rode a spare jumpseat (hard as a rock and a 90deg angle) the whole way back. Now that is pushing it!

kayrharris · #9 Post by **kayrharris** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 12:27 pm

I think the web cam shower will be fun. Why did they wait so long to have it?
Maybe if it had been sooner, it would have been easier for you to get there.

Enjoy it and let us know how it turned out.

I think at 8 months you're better off not flying...jmho.

marrymeflyfree · #10 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 12:42 pm

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
Anyone who has been pregnant will understand why you didn't want to travel to the shower.

Yes...everyone was fine with it. I called them all personally to explain, and they were all great about it. Besides, it's a great excuse for all the gals to get together even if I'm not there, and they were due for it.

More than anything, I think it will be good for my mom. I think she's felt a bit left out of the whole process since we live so far apart, so now she can feel like she's doing some grandmotherly.

marrymeflyfree · #11 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 12:48 pm

kayrharris wrote:I think the web cam shower will be fun. Why did they wait so long to have it?
Maybe if it had been sooner, it would have been easier for you to get there.

Enjoy it and let us know how it turned out.

I think at 8 months you're better off not flying...jmho.

It was partly my fault that they waited...I didn't really want to have a shower because the people that I'm closest to live all over the place - and I felt funny about my peeps in TN doing one since I haven't been there much for them in the last many years. My aunt practically insisted, though, and this week was the only time I had between appointments and other obligations. I wasn't worried about traveling since I've been feeling so great - but lately the pull the stay put has been strong, and I cancelled two other trips I was supposed to make in the last couple of weeks as well.

I figure it just creates a need for another get together to make up for it...after the wee one is here and we feel comfortable traveling with it. That isn't a bad thing.

kayrharris · #12 Post by **kayrharris** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 2:07 pm

They'll be thrilled when you come with the baby. It's not too hard traveling with a wee one, but all the stuff that goes with it is the hard part.

TheConfessor · #13 Post by **TheConfessor** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 2:36 pm

MMFF, I wanted to express my support for you and join in the fun, so I did a Google search on "web cam shower" and went to the site it found. I declare, you certainly have some interesting friends! I didn't know Tennessee folks were so uninhibited. I hope you can introduce me to a few of them. Sorry you missed the festivities, but at least you were there in spirit. Good luck with becoming a mom and whatever comes next.

marrymeflyfree · #14 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 9:36 pm

TheConfessor wrote:MMFF, I wanted to express my support for you and join in the fun, so I did a Google search on "web cam shower" and went to the site it found. I declare, you certainly have some interesting friends! I didn't know Tennessee folks were so uninhibited.

Well you know those wiley mountain folk get a little crazy on the 'shine.

dodgersteve182 · #15 Post by **dodgersteve182** » Sun Mar 30, 2008 9:27 am

MMFF said "Baby shower by webcam should be interesting."

I think I'm a subscriber to that website. Or is it called Dorm Showers by webcam"

tlynn78 · #16 Post by **tlynn78** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 9:34 am

MMFF, you're right to listen to your body - it's in charge at this point. Take it easy, and best of luck to you with this new adventure.

A friend of mine, a FA who lives here in the states but whose family is all in the UK, flew back here from London at 39 weeks! The worst of it was that there were no empty seats, so she rode a spare jumpseat (hard as a rock and a 90deg angle) the whole way back.

lol - this brings back memories. I travelled in a jump seat, basically one of those lattice-webbing lawn chairs bolted to the wall of the plane, from Manilla to Korea at 8 months. That was fun. There were exactly 6 normal airline seats on that plane, all occupied by male officers. Not one offered to trade. Didn't really expect it, but thought it was funny, at the time. After that trip, I flew back to the states - 22 hours in the air - ugh. But baby waited and was born a month after I landed.

t.

marrymeflyfree · #17 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 9:53 am

dodgersteve182 wrote:MMFF said "Baby shower by webcam should be interesting."

I think I'm a subscriber to that website. Or is it called Dorm Showers by webcam"

You wouldn't have seen me on that website...I'm on maternity leave, remember??

But weirdly enough, it's a little disconcerting how many preggo fetish sites come up when googling pregnancy stuff. Ick.

marrymeflyfree · #18 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:00 am

tlynn78 wrote: lol - this brings back memories. I travelled in a jump seat, basically one of those lattice-webbing lawn chairs bolted to the wall of the plane, from Manilla to Korea at 8 months. That was fun. There were exactly 6 normal airline seats on that plane, all occupied by male officers. Not one offered to trade. Didn't really expect it, but thought it was funny, at the time. After that trip, I flew back to the states - 22 hours in the air - ugh. But baby waited and was born a month after I landed.

Makes a great story for your kid!

We're going to keep a logbook of every flight this one takes...we toyed with the idea of starting it while in utero, but thought that might be overkill with all the flying I did before my leave started.

Many years ago, the old British airline BOAC used to give logbooks to kids on their flights. A few months back, an older passenger gave me his and asked us to fill it out for the flight - he had the signatures of every crew member from every flight he'd taken. Ever. Very cool to look through it all! When I took it up to the pit for the pilots' signatures, the captain thought it looked familiar. Sure enough, he had signed it once before - almost 30 years earlier when he'd been a young pilot at a different airline!

tlynn78 · #19 Post by **tlynn78** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:02 am

We're going to keep a logbook of every flight this one takes

That's a great idea!

Sure enough, he had signed it once before - almost 30 years earlier when he'd been a young pilot at a different airline!

How cool is that!

t.

marrymeflyfree · #20 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:07 am

Baby Shower by Webcam went off pretty well....most people still came and they had a good time without me. My cousin's four year old had a ball opening all of the gifts and holding them up to the camera.

I got to 'see' a very elderly great aunt for the first time in a long while, and was amazed by the quilt she made for the wee one. She's made them for all of her kids and grandkids, and took over for my grandmother when she passed. They both had very large families...she had 10 and my grandmother had 15 - and they've all got kids and grandkids themselves now. And she's quilted for all of them. It's a tradition on that side of the family going back several generations, and I'll keep this quilt with the one her sister made for me.

All in all, it was a good thing.

earendel · #21 Post by **earendel** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:20 am

marrymeflyfree wrote:
dodgersteve182 wrote:MMFF said "Baby shower by webcam should be interesting."

I think I'm a subscriber to that website. Or is it called Dorm Showers by webcam"
You wouldn't have seen me on that website...I'm on maternity leave, remember??

But weirdly enough, it's a little disconcerting how many preggo fetish sites come up when googling pregnancy stuff. Ick.

There was an episode of "Two and a Half Men" that had this as a subplot - Alan (the dweeb brother) had a "thing" for pregnant women - the "riper" the better.

christie1111 · #22 Post by **christie1111** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:34 am

was amazed by the quilt she made for the wee one.

A picture will be necessary for the 2 quilting Christie(y)s.

peacock2121 · #23 Post by **peacock2121** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:38 am

marrymeflyfree wrote:Baby Shower by Webcam went off pretty well....most people still came and they had a good time without me. My cousin's four year old had a ball opening all of the gifts and holding them up to the camera.

I got to 'see' a very elderly great aunt for the first time in a long while, and was amazed by the quilt she made for the wee one. She's made them for all of her kids and grandkids, and took over for my grandmother when she passed. They both had very large families...she had 10 and my grandmother had 15 - and they've all got kids and grandkids themselves now. And she's quilted for all of them. It's a tradition on that side of the family going back several generations, and I'll keep this quilt with the one her sister made for me.

All in all, it was a good thing.

How great that they rolled with the flow!

I love that they got the little one involved as well.

marrymeflyfree · #24 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 11:50 am

earendel wrote:
There was an episode of "Two and a Half Men" that had this as a subplot - Alan (the dweeb brother) had a "thing" for pregnant women - the "riper" the better.

Great show - and this episode re-ran just a couple of days ago!

marrymeflyfree · #25 Post by **marrymeflyfree** » Mon Mar 31, 2008 11:54 am

christie1111 wrote:
A picture will be necessary for the 2 quilting Christie(y)s.

Not the greatest pic, but it's the only one I have. The quilter will be 90 in a few months, and she does everything by hand.

We have a quilt that her grandmother made hanging in a local museum. It was made from the old canvas tobacco pouches, which is noteworthy to appalachian historians, I'm told.