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venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 9:42 am
by a1mamacat
You all may remember me posting about my Dad giving me (for $1.00) his 1/2 duplex because of all the care and work I had done for him and my mother over the past few years while their health declined. My brother, over those 2 years, visited them about 4 times a year. He also took off on a ski holiday 2 days after my mother died, returning only for her service.

Dad's will is very clear that his estate is to be split 50/50 between my brother and I. My brother is very wealthy, worth about 5 million or so. Dad wanted to make sure that I was comfortable.

The day after my Dad died, my brother, who is co-executor with a bank, advised the bank that my house was an "early dispersal" from the estate. After taxes and fees, there will be about $600,000 left, and he feels he should receive all of it, balanced against my house.

His problem is that I am aware of what the will says, I know of several friends of my Dad's who he told about why he gave me the house, and also that now that I no longer have to play peacekeeper to my brother's antics, he will have to get me to sign away my half of Dad's estate.

Not happening.

I have already been in touch with the bank executor, as advised that my house was a gift for services rendered to my parents, and I will not be ceding anything.

The bank executor advised that they go by the will, and there is NOTHING stated in the will about my house be dispersed early, so they CAN'T consider it's value. My dad's lawyer, who drew up both documents advises that the house cannot be added to the value after the fact.

My brother can suck it!

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 9:48 am
by Catfish
Suck it indeed. So sorry you have to deal with this.

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 9:50 am
by mrkelley23
Always amazes me how shitty people can get after family deaths. I've seen it happen on multiple occasions, in multiple families. Luckily, (knock wood) we have avoided that so far in my family.

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 10:21 am
by BackInTex
We could swap some good inter-family stories (my wife's side, not mine). But I think you'd win. Sorry your brother is such a dickhead.

Your brother would happen to be Martin Shkreli is he?

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 12:26 pm
by geoffil
What is it about family members that turn so greedy after a loved one dies?Without naming names my experience has been>>>- person A sold stock belonging to grandchild B and had it deposited into checking account where person A was beneficiary BEFORE the grandparent died leaving grandchild with no stock/money.Stock broker even said person A called to sell stock not grandparent. NOPE probate judge said person A gets to keep grandchilds stock money. Probate lawyer sold grandparents house to his friend for 100,000 less than market value, but probate judge said that was OK even gave probate lawyer his "realtor" fee. Person A got their name on grandparent credit card and charged 15,000$ worth of stuff for themselves not for grandparent. Estate had to pay credit card even though it was bought by person A.

UGH!

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 12:45 pm
by Appa23
geoffil wrote:What is it about family members that turn so greedy after a loved one dies?Without naming names my experience has been>>>- person A sold stock belonging to grandchild B and had it deposited into checking account where person A was beneficiary BEFORE the grandparent died leaving grandchild with no stock/money.Stock broker even said person A called to sell stock not grandparent. NOPE probate judge said person A gets to keep grandchilds stock money. Probate lawyer sold grandparents house to his friend for 100,000 less than market value, but probate judge said that was OK even gave probate lawyer his "realtor" fee. Person A got their name on grandparent credit card and charged 15,000$ worth of stuff for themselves not for grandparent. Estate had to pay credit card even though it was bought by person A.

UGH!
I am surprised that the estate had to pay the credit card. In handling my sister's estate for my nephew after she died, I exchanged a few calls with collection agencies and/or collection departments of credit card companies. (The collection agencies just because it can take some time to set up an estate when there is no will and the attorney is busy with his day job.) In the case of every major credit card, none filed a claim against the estate, and the collection folks advised me that they were not allowed to file a claim.

No real issues after my MIL died in late August. She was smart and had created "payable on death" status for nearly everything -- retirement accounts, bank accounts, car, house. There was less than 40,000 "in the estate", so did not need to file probate in Kansas. (A college frat brother was my MIL's atty, and he handled everything.) SIL and wife generally got along, although we incurred way more expenses in getting the house on the market (plus my wife stayed in KC with my MIL for about 8 weeks before she died, with lots of family trips back and forth for us).

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 3:45 pm
by geoffil
I am surprised that the estate had to pay the credit card. In handling my sister's estate for my nephew after she died, I exchanged a few calls with collection agencies and/or collection departments of credit card companies. (The collection agencies just because it can take some time to set up an estate when there is no will and the attorney is busy with his day job.) In the case of every major credit card, none filed a claim against the estate, and the collection folks advised me that they were not allowed to file a claim.
Right! When the probate lawyer and greedy person A are working together to bill the estate megabucks to probate the small estate, the lawyer does whatever person A tells him to do. Grandchild's parent ( who didn't get the stock) had to file a motion with probate judge to have judge review the bill of probate lawyer and money got refunded to the estate. lawyer was billing legal rate for non-legal work (checking on house, paying estate bills, checking the mail, opening the mail, to the tune of over $50,000 for an estate with less than 300,000) Well karma bit person A in the butt, bc the grandchild who got all the stock sales proceeds, got a DUI, dropped out of college and had a baby and is not married. When you don't have morals you probably raise a child without said morals.

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 3:50 pm
by BackInTex
geoffil wrote:
Right! When the probate lawyer and greedy person A are working together to bill the estate megabucks to probate the small estate, the lawyer does whatever person A tells him to do. Grandchild's parent ( who didn't get the stock) had to file a motion with probate judge to have judge review the bill of probate lawyer and money got refunded to the estate. lawyer was billing legal rate for non-legal work
Isn't there a mechanism to censure or otherwise penalize that lawyer by the state board? Seems if the judge felt there was impropriety something could be done more than just asking for some of the money back.

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 4:07 pm
by Bob78164
a1mamacat wrote:You all may remember me posting about my Dad giving me (for $1.00) his 1/2 duplex because of all the care and work I had done for him and my mother over the past few years while their health declined. My brother, over those 2 years, visited them about 4 times a year. He also took off on a ski holiday 2 days after my mother died, returning only for her service.

Dad's will is very clear that his estate is to be split 50/50 between my brother and I. My brother is very wealthy, worth about 5 million or so. Dad wanted to make sure that I was comfortable.

The day after my Dad died, my brother, who is co-executor with a bank, advised the bank that my house was an "early dispersal" from the estate. After taxes and fees, there will be about $600,000 left, and he feels he should receive all of it, balanced against my house.

His problem is that I am aware of what the will says, I know of several friends of my Dad's who he told about why he gave me the house, and also that now that I no longer have to play peacekeeper to my brother's antics, he will have to get me to sign away my half of Dad's estate.

Not happening.

I have already been in touch with the bank executor, as advised that my house was a gift for services rendered to my parents, and I will not be ceding anything.

The bank executor advised that they go by the will, and there is NOTHING stated in the will about my house be dispersed early, so they CAN'T consider it's value. My dad's lawyer, who drew up both documents advises that the house cannot be added to the value after the fact.

My brother can suck it!
I'm glad your father had the foresight to use a lawyer to document these transactions. I'm sorry that your brother is a greedy son of a bitch to whom money is so important. --Bob

Re: venting

Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2018 4:34 pm
by geoffil
A complaint was filed, but nothing happened. :shock:

Re: venting

Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2018 4:10 pm
by jaybee
mrkelley23 wrote:Always amazes me how shitty people can get after family deaths. I've seen it happen on multiple occasions, in multiple families. Luckily, (knock wood) we have avoided that so far in my family.
And sadly, that sums it up perfectly. Death and greed can bring out the worst in people.

Similar to what others have shared: Mrs. Jaybee was the one of four kids who took care of all her moms needs - both during her last two years of dementia and after her death. My beloved is organized to a fault, she documented everything. Everything got split equally 4 ways and was done exactly as her mom wished. We were fine with that as was her younger brother. The two sisters however .... a whole lot of bitchin' going on.

It's just sad. Saucy, I'm sorry that you are going through with this but you are doing what is right and what your dad wanted. Stick to your guns.

Re: venting

Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2018 5:21 pm
by geoffil
Similar to what others have shared: Mrs. Jaybee was the one of four kids who took care of all her moms needs - both during her last two years of dementia and after her death. My beloved is organized to a fault, she documented everything. Everything got split equally 4 ways and was done exactly as her mom wished. We were fine with that as was her younger brother. The two sisters however .... a whole lot of bitchin' going on.
Let me guess_ The two sisters were the ones that did the least work when it came time to help Mom. The ones that do the least are usually the greediest.

Re: venting

Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2018 8:38 pm
by jaybee
geoffil wrote: Let me guess_ The two sisters were the ones that did the least work when it came time to help Mom. The ones that do the least are usually the greediest.
Bingo! Sadly predictable.