Meanwhile, in Florida...

[Vandal]

First ever Florida Man Games to feature ‘evading arrest’ obstacle course

It ain’t the Olympics, but a group of Floridians plan to host competitions themed according to the collective antics of the beer-loving, gator-possessing, rap-sheet heavy, mullet-wearing social media phenomenon known as ‘Florida Man’.

Organizers of the Florida Man Games describe the competition as “the most insane athletic showdown on Earth”. The games will poke fun at Florida’s reputation for producing strange news stories involving guns, drugs, booze and reptiles – or some combination of the four.

Among the contests planned for next February in St Augustine, Florida, according to organizers, are the Evading Arrest Obstacle Course in which contestants jump over fences and through yards while being chased by real police officers; the Category 5 Cash Grab in which participants try to grab as much money in a wind-blowing booth; and the self-explanatory beer-belly wrestling.

“This isn’t just a competition; it’s a one-of-a-kind Floridian spectacle!” organizers said on the games’ website.

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2023/ ... cial-media

[Vandal]

Florida man throws package of Oreos at wife while arguing over empty coffee maker

A Florida man allegedly threw a package of Oreo cookies at his wife while the two were arguing over their empty coffee maker.

Deputies wrote in an affidavit that John Sandoval, 70, was arrested Saturday morning after he allegedly threw the package of Oreo cookies at his wife while the two argued over their coffee maker that had no water in it, according to FOX 35.

According to Lake County Sheriff's deputies, the couple, who has been married for over 40 years, got into a verbal argument while sitting at a table.

https://www.foxnews.com/us/florida-man- ... cmp=tw_fnc

[Vandal]

‘I come home and my driveway is gone’: Florida woman shocked by bizarre theft

A Florida woman trying to sell her house returned home one day to discover that her driveway was gone. The disappearing act was preceded by unsolicited visits from contractors and a series of text messages from a mysterious stranger. CNN affiliate WFTV has more on the curious case.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/florida-woma ... 11543.html

[silverscreenselect]

Back to where it all started:

Florida Man Sues Dunkin’ Donuts Over Toilet Explosion Injuries

A customer at a Winter Park, FL Dunkin’ Donuts has accused the coffee and donut company of negligence in a Wednesday lawsuit, claiming that a toilet in the restaurant’s bathroom exploded on him in 2022. Paul Kerouac is seeking more than $100,000 for “severe and long-term injuries” and “emotional and mental distress” as a result of being covered in human feces, urine, and debris. According to court records, employees told the man that they knew about the “problem with the toilet” from previous incidents. “[Kerouac] requires mental health care and counseling as a direct result of the trauma experienced in the restroom at Defendant’s business and from the continuing trauma following the event,” the lawsuit stated. It also asserted that Dunkin’ failed to maintain the toilet or warn Kerouac beforehand. Neither Kerouac’s attorney nor Dunkin’ immediately responded to the Associated Press’ request for comment.

I'm not sure what you tell someone on the run to the bathroom after consuming a few too many jelly doughnuts. "Watch out, the toilet might explode?"

[BackInTex]

Back to where it all started:

Florida Man Sues Dunkin’ Donuts Over Toilet Explosion Injuries

A customer at a Winter Park, FL Dunkin’ Donuts has accused the coffee and donut company of negligence in a Wednesday lawsuit, claiming that a toilet in the restaurant’s bathroom exploded on him in 2022. Paul Kerouac is seeking more than $100,000 for “severe and long-term injuries” and “emotional and mental distress” as a result of being covered in human feces, urine, and debris. According to court records, employees told the man that they knew about the “problem with the toilet” from previous incidents. “[Kerouac] requires mental health care and counseling as a direct result of the trauma experienced in the restroom at Defendant’s business and from the continuing trauma following the event,” the lawsuit stated. It also asserted that Dunkin’ failed to maintain the toilet or warn Kerouac beforehand. Neither Kerouac’s attorney nor Dunkin’ immediately responded to the Associated Press’ request for comment.

I'm not sure what you tell someone on the run to the bathroom after consuming a few too many jelly doughnuts. "Watch out, the toilet might explode?"

Yeah, my response to that might be "You think the TOILET might explode? I'll give IT something to explode about!"

[Vandal]

Florida man sues Dunkin' for $50,000 in damages after claiming 'exploding toilet' left him covered in human feces

A man in Florida is suing Dunkin' for over $50,000 in damages.

Paul Kerouac claimed that a Dunkin' store toilet exploded in 2022, covering him in debris.

In the lawsuit, Kerouac claimed he suffered "severe and long term injuries."

A man in Florida is suing Dunkin' for more than $50,000 in damages after claiming a toilet exploded and covered him in feces and urine, according to a lawsuit seen by Business Insider.

Paul Kerouac claimed that in 2022, he suffered "severe and long-term injuries" after the toilet exploded in the men's room of a Dunkin' store in Winter Park, Florida.



https://football.fantasysports.yahoo.co ... ks?week=18

[BackInTex]

Florida man sues Dunkin' for $50,000 in damages after claiming 'exploding toilet' left him covered in human feces

A man in Florida is suing Dunkin' for over $50,000 in damages.

Paul Kerouac claimed that a Dunkin' store toilet exploded in 2022, covering him in debris.

In the lawsuit, Kerouac claimed he suffered "severe and long term injuries."

A man in Florida is suing Dunkin' for more than $50,000 in damages after claiming a toilet exploded and covered him in feces and urine, according to a lawsuit seen by Business Insider.

Paul Kerouac claimed that in 2022, he suffered "severe and long-term injuries" after the toilet exploded in the men's room of a Dunkin' store in Winter Park, Florida.



https://football.fantasysports.yahoo.co ... ks?week=18

Again? He’s a persistent fella.

[Vandal]

I should look upstream, first.

[mrkelley23]

I should look upstream, first.

Always good advice.

[silverscreenselect]

Idaho man confessed to killing girlfriend, living with corpse for weeks, police say

Authorities say a man was arrested in Idaho Falls, Idaho after he allegedly confessed to the murder of his girlfriend and lived with her body for several weeks.
The Idaho Falls Police Department said they arrested Chris Foiles, 42, on Friday, after he was spotted exiting a motorhome associated with a woman who was reported missing last month in Montana. Foiles was detained, and police said they found evidence inside the motorhome to arrest him on the charge of first degree murder.

Foiles exited the motor home and allegedly shouted "I am Chris Foiles, I killed my girlfriend, she is in the RV," when police approached him. When police searched the motorhome, they found a woman's body with a tattoo similar to Stedman's, and credit cards in her name. Foiles allegedly waived his Miranda rights during an interview with police and told them the body found in the motorhome was Stedman's.

Stedman's family told KHQ that Foiles was her estranged boyfriend. Foiles told police that he and Stedman arrived in Idaho Falls around Dec. 22 and parked the motorhome in a Walmart parking lot, the Spokesman-Review reported. In his interview with police, Foiles said that a few weeks before his arrest, he got into an argument with Stedman and stabbed her in the neck. He then "intentionally stabbed Megan in the chest with the intent to kill her." Foiles allegedly heard Stedman still moving in the back of the motorhome and then proceeded to stab her multiple times until she stopped moving.

https://currently.att.yahoo.com/news/ma ... _test=1_11

[Vandal]

Florida lawmaker wants bill to shoot bears "who are on crack."

The allegation from Republican state congressman Jason Shoaf, whose biography reveals a passion for hunting, is bizarre even by the already unorthodox standards of Florida, which in recent times has boasted cocaine sharks and marauding herpes-ridden monkeys.

“We’re talking about the ones that are on crack, and they break your door down, and they’re standing in your living room growling and tearing your house apart,” Shoaf told a meeting of the Florida legislature’s house infrastructure strategies committee discussing his House Bill 87, which would remove most penalties for killing bears without authorization.

“When you run into one of these crack bears, you should be able to shoot it, period. And you shouldn’t have to pause or be afraid you’re gonna get arrested or harassed or pay fines. That’s just crazy.”

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/202 ... ason-shoaf

[silverscreenselect]

Florida lawmaker wants bill to shoot bears "who are on crack."

The allegation from Republican state congressman Jason Shoaf, whose biography reveals a passion for hunting, is bizarre even by the already unorthodox standards of Florida, which in recent times has boasted cocaine sharks and marauding herpes-ridden monkeys.

“We’re talking about the ones that are on crack, and they break your door down, and they’re standing in your living room growling and tearing your house apart,” Shoaf told a meeting of the Florida legislature’s house infrastructure strategies committee discussing his House Bill 87, which would remove most penalties for killing bears without authorization.

“When you run into one of these crack bears, you should be able to shoot it, period. And you shouldn’t have to pause or be afraid you’re gonna get arrested or harassed or pay fines. That’s just crazy.”

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/202 ... ason-shoaf

He must have seen Cocaine Bear too many times.

[Vandal]

Alabama:

Someone stole a Jasper radio station’s 200-foot tower, owner says

The owner of an Alabama radio station is stunned, and out a lot of money, after thieves made off with his 200-foot radio tower.
The theft was discovered Friday when landscapers went to clean up the area.
Brett Elmore, owner of WJLX in Jasper, then received an unexpected, and baffling, call.
“He said, ‘Brett, we’re down here and the tower’s gone.’’
“I said, ‘The tower’s gone?’ and he said, ‘Yeah, the tower’s gone.”
The landscaper assured Elmore he had walked the property, and the massive steel tower was nowhere to be found.
“I said, ‘It’s a 200-foot tower. You would see it somewhere if it was laying around,’’ Elmore said.


https://www.al.com/news/2024/02/someone ... -says.html

[jarnon]

Half Moon Bay: Authorities ID Florida man who allegedly stole plane and ditched it on beach

[jarnon]

A twofer today, mate.



The Hillsborough County sheriff has a rather sophisticated IR night vision camera.

[silverscreenselect]

A bit of Blarney from the Emerald Isle

Mom Blows Shot at Disability Payout After Winning Local Christmas Tree Toss

An Irish court has thrown out an injury claim filed by a mom who was photographed competing in—and winning—a Christmas tree toss by a newspaper, with a court ruling it proved her injuries from a 2017 car crash weren’t as bad as she claimed. The bizarre mistake by Kamila Grabska, 34, may have cost her as much as $820,000, which was how much she requested as payout from an insurance company. Grabska claimed the crash left her in “debilitating pain,” saying she was no longer able to lift grocery bags and that she was regularly bedridden, the Irish Independent reported. She claimed the pain was so severe, she couldn’t work for more than five years, so she sued the insurance company for past and future lost wages. Grabska lost any hope in a payout after photos from the 2018 Christmas tree toss competition surfaced in her hometown, which showed her chucking a massive spruce. Another photo showed her smiling with a plaque that declared her the competition’s winner. The case’s judge noted that Grabska didn’t appear to be in pain at the competition, with the Independent reporting he said it was a “very large, natural Christmas tree” being thrown with “very agile movement.”

[Vandal]

Weekend at Bernie’s, Ohio style…

Dead Ohio man's roommates drove body to withdraw money from his bank account, police say

Two roommates of a recently deceased man were each charged with abusing a corpse after propping up his body to withdraw money from his bank, police said.

The pair, Loreen B. Feralo, 55, and Karen Kasbohm, 63, found the man dead Monday and took his body to a bank where they had previously accompanied him, Ashtabula Police Chief Robert B. Stell said in a statement.


https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/de ... cna142584

[silverscreenselect]

Human remains found in backyard of Jacksonville home after owner discovers ‘toes sticking out of ground’

Police were investigating Thursday morning after human remains were found buried in the backyard of a Jacksonville home, according to the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office. The owner of the home, located on Sunny Acres Drive in the Magnolia Gardens neighborhood, said he discovered “toes sticking out of the ground” as he was doing some yard work, according to a woman who was helping the owner with the yard work. “We were working inside the house and then the owner came to us and said ‘Hey, there is something here. We have to call 911. I said OK. I was shook,” the woman, who did not want to be identified, told News4JAX. The source shared photos with News4JAX of what appeared to be a human foot sticking out of the ground.

“They were all black and stuff. But I guess that was from decomposing,” the woman said. “I just hope that everything gets solved. My reaction to this is just craziness. I would never expect this, especially at a house that I am working at.” Workers told News4JAX they were doing renovations at the rental property when they made this gruesome discovery. “Me and my son, we both was here and we were just looking around trying to see what else we need to do to the house. We put new windows and new kitchen and bathroom. Just trying to make it right for the next homeowner,” the homeowner, who did not want to be identified, said. “I want to offer my condolences to the young person or to the person they found at my property. No family at all should have to go through that at all. That’s the first thing I want to say. No family should have to go through that. I don’t know who that is, I don’t know what the situation is.”

[Vandal]

Jerk move by the Dodgers….

Dodgers’ minor league team unwittingly rebrands with a NSFW name

Chaqueta is the Spanish word for jacket.

But it also has another meaning that is, let’s just say, NSFW. The word can also be slang for masturbation.

The Rancho Cucamonga Quakes were unaware of the word’s second meaning when they chose the nickname Chaquetas for Minor League Baseball’s Copa de la Diversión series this season.

The Dodgers’ single-A minor league affiliate has decided to stick with Chaquetas as their name during their three Copa events this season — but only after a few tense hours following their announcement of the moniker Thursday morning.

https://www.latimes.com/sports/story/20 ... ame-change

[Vandal]

Foreshadowing at its finest:

BEN FOLDS FIVE FRONTMAN DIVORCES FIFTH WIFE EMMA SANDALL AFTER 6 YEARS OF MARRIAGE

Ben Folds Five frontman and pianist, Benjamin Scott Folds filed this week to divorce his wife, Australian ballet dancer Emma Sandall, after six years of marriage, stating irreconcilable differences in the pleadings. Under a proposed marital dissolution agreement, Folds will be required to pay Sandall a lump sum of $475,000 for any interest she has in their Nashville home. Additionally, Folds will pay $650,000 over a period of 24 months ($27,083.33/monthly), pay the cost of her car insurance for the next year, pay her $50,000 of additional funds to assist in the purchase of furniture for her new home, and pay her $210,000 AUD from a National Australian Bank account once the divorce is finalized. Folds has four prior marriages since 1987.


https://www.scoopnashville.com/2023/12/ ... -marriage/

[tlynn78]

Foreshadowing at its finest:

BEN FOLDS FIVE FRONTMAN DIVORCES FIFTH WIFE EMMA SANDALL AFTER 6 YEARS OF MARRIAGE

Ben Folds Five frontman and pianist, Benjamin Scott Folds filed this week to divorce his wife, Australian ballet dancer Emma Sandall, after six years of marriage, stating irreconcilable differences in the pleadings. Under a proposed marital dissolution agreement, Folds will be required to pay Sandall a lump sum of $475,000 for any interest she has in their Nashville home. Additionally, Folds will pay $650,000 over a period of 24 months ($27,083.33/monthly), pay the cost of her car insurance for the next year, pay her $50,000 of additional funds to assist in the purchase of furniture for her new home, and pay her $210,000 AUD from a National Australian Bank account once the divorce is finalized. Folds has four prior marriages since 1987.


https://www.scoopnashville.com/2023/12/ ... -marriage/

Ouch!

[BackInTex]

Foreshadowing at its finest:

BEN FOLDS FIVE FRONTMAN DIVORCES FIFTH WIFE EMMA SANDALL AFTER 6 YEARS OF MARRIAGE

Ben Folds Five frontman and pianist, Benjamin Scott Folds filed this week to divorce his wife, Australian ballet dancer Emma Sandall, after six years of marriage, stating irreconcilable differences in the pleadings. Under a proposed marital dissolution agreement, Folds will be required to pay Sandall a lump sum of $475,000 for any interest she has in their Nashville home. Additionally, Folds will pay $650,000 over a period of 24 months ($27,083.33/monthly), pay the cost of her car insurance for the next year, pay her $50,000 of additional funds to assist in the purchase of furniture for her new home, and pay her $210,000 AUD from a National Australian Bank account once the divorce is finalized. Folds has four prior marriages since 1987.


https://www.scoopnashville.com/2023/12/ ... -marriage/

Ouch!

There's a tongue twister in there somewhere.

[Vandal]

Woman shoots 2 drivers on I-10 in Florida after telling hotel staff she was going on a shooting spree 'directed by God because of the eclipse,' police say

Taylon Nichelle Celestine, a 22-year-old woman from Georgia, embarked on a shooting spree in Florida, claiming it was “directed by God” due to a solar eclipse. She fired at two vehicles on a highway, injuring two drivers, one of whom was grazed in the arm and the other hit in the neck. After driving for about 16 miles, she was stopped by troopers who found her with an AR-15 rifle and a 9mm handgun. Celestine was arrested, charged with attempted murder, aggravated battery with a deadly weapon, and improper discharge of a firearm, and is currently in Holmes County jail.

https://twitter.com/TheDailyID/status/1 ... 2478559631

[Vandal]

John Wayne Bobbitt, Whose Wife Famously Chopped Off His Penis, Has Toes Amputated Due to Contaminated Water

John Wayne Bobbitt has had his toes amputated over 30 years since he made headlines when then-wife Lorena Bobbitt sliced off penis.

The former Marine, 57, has been diagnosed with toxic peripheral polyneuropathy, he revealed in a new interview with The Sun, due to his time at infamous military base Camp Lejeune in North Carolina in the '80s, when the base’s water was severely contaminated.

The condition involves damage to the peripheral nervous system, which sends signals between the central nervous system and other body parts, per the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke.

According to John, who now lives in Florida, it has caused him both nerve damage and osteomyelitis, a bone infection that leads to ulcers and requires skin grafts.


https://people.com/john-wayne-bobbitt-h ... er-8631292

[silverscreenselect]

John Wayne Bobbitt, Whose Wife Famously Chopped Off His Penis, Has Toes Amputated Due to Contaminated Water

John Wayne Bobbitt has had his toes amputated over 30 years since he made headlines when then-wife Lorena Bobbitt sliced off penis.

The former Marine, 57, has been diagnosed with toxic peripheral polyneuropathy, he revealed in a new interview with The Sun, due to his time at infamous military base Camp Lejeune in North Carolina in the '80s, when the base’s water was severely contaminated.

The condition involves damage to the peripheral nervous system, which sends signals between the central nervous system and other body parts, per the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke.

According to John, who now lives in Florida, it has caused him both nerve damage and osteomyelitis, a bone infection that leads to ulcers and requires skin grafts.


https://people.com/john-wayne-bobbitt-h ... er-8631292

Lorena probably saw this article and thought to herself, I should have just waited a few years and let nature take its course.