For all you media haters out there.....

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ulysses5019
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For all you media haters out there.....

#1 Post by ulysses5019 » Mon Jul 21, 2008 5:47 pm

Subject: FW: The Demographics of American Newspapers:

1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.

2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.

3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are pretty good at crossword puzzles.

4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.

5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running the country--if they could find the time -- and if they didn't have to leave Southern California to do it.

6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country and did a poor job of it.

7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure who's running the country and don't really care as long as they can get a seat on the A train.

8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who is running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated and half nude.

9. The Rocky Mountain News is read by people who have recently caught a walleye and need something in which to wrap it.

10. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country but need the baseball and soccer scores.

11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.

12. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure if there is a country or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country, or galaxy, provided, of course, that they are not Republicans.
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.

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Beebs52
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#2 Post by Beebs52 » Mon Jul 21, 2008 7:16 pm

The Houston Chronicle is read by those who need perfect ribs, brisket, pulled pork, Tex Mex and will start their own country if pissed off enough.

I shall copyright this if I need to.
Well, then

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ulysses5019
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#3 Post by ulysses5019 » Mon Jul 21, 2008 8:05 pm

Beebs52 wrote:The Houston Chronicle is read by those who need perfect ribs, brisket, pulled pork, Tex Mex and will start their own country if pissed off enough.

I shall copyright this if I need to.
So, are you a subscriber or not?
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.

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Ronnnnn
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#4 Post by Ronnnnn » Mon Jul 21, 2008 8:16 pm

Beebs52 wrote:The Houston Chronicle is read by those who need perfect ribs, brisket, pulled pork, Tex Mex and will start their own country if pissed off enough.

I'lll handle thee perfectt ribb recipees, thankk yoou....

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Beebs52
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#5 Post by Beebs52 » Tue Jul 22, 2008 9:59 am

ulysses5019 wrote:
Beebs52 wrote:The Houston Chronicle is read by those who need perfect ribs, brisket, pulled pork, Tex Mex and will start their own country if pissed off enough.

I shall copyright this if I need to.
So, are you a subscriber or not?
Well, heyell yes. For the crossword puzzles. And Zest. And the comics.
Well, then

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SportsFan68
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Re: For all you media haters out there.....

#6 Post by SportsFan68 » Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:05 am

ulysses5019 wrote:Subject: FW: The Demographics of American Newspapers:

1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
LOL!

I read the Wall Street Journal.

Disclaimer: Because my boss gets it at work, and I snag it first. :mrgreen:
-- In Iroquois society, leaders are encouraged to remember seven generations in the past and consider seven generations in the future when making decisions that affect the people.
-- America would be a better place if leaders would do more long-term thinking. -- Wilma Mankiller

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Re: For all you media haters out there.....

#7 Post by SportsFan68 » Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:12 am

ulysses5019 wrote:9. The Rocky Mountain News is read by people who have recently caught a walleye and need something in which to wrap it.
Hey! And trout and freshwater salmon...
-- In Iroquois society, leaders are encouraged to remember seven generations in the past and consider seven generations in the future when making decisions that affect the people.
-- America would be a better place if leaders would do more long-term thinking. -- Wilma Mankiller

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ulysses5019
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Re: For all you media haters out there.....

#8 Post by ulysses5019 » Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:29 am

SportsFan68 wrote:
ulysses5019 wrote:9. The Rocky Mountain News is read by people who have recently caught a walleye and need something in which to wrap it.
Hey! And trout and freshwater salmon...
What do you do with the Rocky Mountain oysters?
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.

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SportsFan68
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Re: For all you media haters out there.....

#9 Post by SportsFan68 » Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:38 am

ulysses5019 wrote:
SportsFan68 wrote:
ulysses5019 wrote:9. The Rocky Mountain News is read by people who have recently caught a walleye and need something in which to wrap it.
Hey! And trout and freshwater salmon...
What do you do with the Rocky Mountain oysters?
They're in with the zebra mussels and New Zealand mud snails.

Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!
-- In Iroquois society, leaders are encouraged to remember seven generations in the past and consider seven generations in the future when making decisions that affect the people.
-- America would be a better place if leaders would do more long-term thinking. -- Wilma Mankiller

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